A practical guide to coping with infidelity, explaining how affairs begin, how to end them, and how to restore the marriage afterwards.

Cheated on…Battered by emotion…You don't know where to turn. You feel betrayed, devastated, embarrassed, angry, and completely heartbroken. You ask yourself, "How can I stop infidelity from ruining my life?" "How do I cope with this nightmare? You don't realize there is a roadmap that explains what you are going through. That roadmap is Cheating in a Nutshell. Knowledge is Power and Understanding is Liberating. Whatever shade of infidelity you're dealing with, it is powerfully painful – and the feelings that come with it are hardly ever simple. Understanding your pain will change your way of thinking almost immediately. This book is for you if: --You just learned your partner cheated on you --You have been staying with a cheating partner --You were betrayed in a past relationship and seek a deeper understanding of your feelings In Cheating in a Nutshell, Wayne and Tamara Mitchell explain the source of your pain. There is a way out of this darkness, and the first step is to understand the structure of this awful experience. "The focus is on the betrayed, not the cheater, and if you've been cheated on, I agree with other reviewers: This is the best book, the only one you need." – Reader Review It's never too late to understand why you feel as you do. Read Cheating in a Nutshell.

"When Brian told me of his affair, my whole world was shattered. Since the affair, and since the difficult recovery period, I have excelled in amazing ways in every area of my life. I look and feel better than I did when I was in my twenties. I have more energy, more zeal and more enthusiasm for life. Since I have gotten over my insecurities, I experience far better relationships with my husband, children and others. I also have more fun. No matter what tragedies happen in our lives, we always have a choice, not a choice over what will happen to us, but a choice over how we will react to it. Will we become bitter or better? I chose to become better, and now my greatest tragedy has also become my greatest personal victory." – Anne Bercht "Would I want to go back to our marriage before the affair? Not a chance! Would I have liked to have gotten to this point some other way? Absolutely! Would I recommend an affair to others so they can reach a greater love and better marriage? Absolutely not! If you have experienced an affair, is rebuilding your marriage worth it? You bet it is! As long as you love each other and are willing to do the work." – Brian Bercht

"One of the foremost relationship experts at work today offers creative insight on building trust and avoiding betrayal, helping readers to decode the mysteries of healthy love and relationships"--

WHEN SHE CHEATED, My Story on SURVIVING Her Affair, is a raw account of my experience when I discovered my ex-wife's affair, and the subsequent navigation of the tumultuous reality brought on by that discovery.This is a story for those who are looking for something in the midst of one of the darkest times they will face. You are probably looking for advice, hope, justification, guidance, statistics, really anything that can help you navigate the turmoil you are facing. I know. I searched high and low and what I found was scarce information on the true emotional experience that a man can expect after discovering his partner's betrayal.I decided to share my story and write this book because I believe my experience and the journey I have been on since the discovery of my ex-wife's betrayal might possibly help someone who is going through a similar struggle and grasping for answers. Within these pages, You will read my story, as well as commentary on my reflections back on key emotions, feelings and thoughts that governed my experience in surviving the immediate aftermath of discovering my ex-wife's affair. You will also find tips on how I endured the pivotal moments following my discovery and some key takeaways from my experience. My name is Sean and I survived my ex-wife's affair. I am not an expert in psychology nor any matter of physical or mental health. What I am an expert in is my experience and I am uniquely qualified to share it. I will go as far to say there is no one more qualified than I am to share my experience.One of the main things I learned is that when you are struggling to survive the aftermath of discovering that your partner is having an affair, you are never as alone as you may feel. My story is emotional and it is raw. I make no apologies for my story and neither should you. In the wake of devastation, there is no shame in struggling to gather your emotions and thoughts. It is okay when you feel like you are losing control. Ultimately, you will get through this and your life will be opened to possibilities and opportunities that you may have never thought possible.Welcome to my story. I hope it helps with yours.

This singular guide presents the straightforward facts on affairs, as well as advice to affairees and spouses on how to cope with them. Since 60% of marriages are affected by affairs, you should know the facts: Women under 30 are as likely as men to have an affair. Love affairs are different from sex affairs. Most affairs last between and three years, but the consequences can last a lifetime. Fewer than 10% of affairees divorce their spouses then marry their lover. Over 75% of those who do divorce and marry their lover divorce again. Nearly 80% of those who divorce during an affair are sorry later. Most marriages survive affairs. If you want to stay married, you can. Prevention works. You can -- and should -- affair-proof your marriage right now.

"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

This book has been replaced by Getting Past the Affair, Second Edition, ISBN 978-1-4625-4748-7.

For more than ten years this resource has been offering sage advice and compassionate, nonjudgmental analysis. Based on the private practices of a licensed marriage and family counselor and a clinical psychologist, it has been completely updated.

Along with changes in the workplace and the explosive growth of electronic communications, there has been a skyrocketing rate of infidelity. This title teaches both the victim and the perpetrator of infidelity how to acknowledge their feelings, reduce their sense of despair, and begin the difficult task of rebuilding a strong relationship.