In this ambitious new work, Frank Broucek explores the affect of shame--its functions, and its relationship to sexuality, self, and others. With a special focus on the relationship between shame and self-objectification, he proposes an innovative new theory that links shame to our sense of self from early development through maturity. In exploring this theme, Broucek--a psychoanalytically trained psychiatrist--breaks new ground in understanding the development of the self, establishing a perspective on narcissism that differs markedly from traditional psychoanalytic concepts. An illuminating overview of the modern literature precedes a provocative analysis of the role of shame in the formation of the self. Here, Broucek identifies the three major sources of shame: the infant's experiences of interpersonal inefficacy; self-objectification resulting in a kind of self-alienation or primary dissociation; and the experience of being unloved, rejected, or scapegoated by important others. In the course of development, these vectors cause the self's overinvestment in the idealized self-image and a devaluation of the actual self, an event explored in depth in the chapter on narcissism. Broucek also addresses the role of shame in psychoanalysis and in society. The neglect of this emotion in psychoanalytic theory and technique, the author contends, results from a critical lack of understanding of shame and its effect--potentially adverse--on the practice of psychotherapy. Finally, Broucek's analysis of widespread shamelessness in modern times logically extends the ideas presented earlier. Maintaining a critical balance in its coverage and interpretation, SHAME AND THE SELF marks a significant contribution to the understanding of the nature of shame and its role in our psychic life. As such, it is essential reading for all practicing psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, and other mental health practitioners.

An intimate look at the full spectrum of shame—often masked by addiction, promiscuity, perfectionism, self-loathing, or narcissism—that offers a new, positive route forward Encounters with embarrassment, guilt, self-consciousness, remorse, etc. are an unavoidable part of everyday life, and they sometimes have lessons to teach us—about our goals and values, about the person we expect ourselves to be. In contrast to the prevailing cultural view of shame as a uniformly toxic influence, Shame is a book that approaches the subject of shame as an entire family of emotions which share a “painful awareness of self.” Challenging widely-accepted views within the self-esteem movement, author Joseph Burgo argues that self-esteem does NOT thrive in the soil of non-stop praise and encouragement, but rather depends upon setting and meeting goals, living up to the expectations we hold for ourselves, and finally sharing our joy in achievement with the people who matter most to us. Along the way, listening to and learning from our encounters with shame will go further than affirmations and positive self-talk in helping us to build authentic self-esteem. Richly illustrated with clinical stories from Burgo's 35 years in private practice, Shame also describes the myriad ways that unacknowledged shame often hides behind a broad spectrum of mental disorders including social anxiety, narcissism, addiction, and masochism.

Shame is one of our most central feelings and a universal human characteristic. Why do we experience it? For what purpose? How can we cope with excessive feelings of shame? In this elegant exposition informed by many years of helping people to understand feelings of shame, leading Jungian analyst Mario Jacoby provided a comprehensive exploration of the many aspects of shame and showed how it occupies a central place in our emotional experience. Jacoby demonstrated that a lack of self-esteem is often at the root of excessive shame, and as well as providing practical examples of how therapy can help, he drew upon a wealth of historical and cultural scholarship to show how important shame is for us in both its individual and social aspects. This Classic Edition includes a new foreword by Marco Della Chiesa.

Chronic shame is painful, corrosive, and elusive. It resists self-help and undermines even intensive psychoanalysis. Patricia A. DeYoung’s cutting-edge book gives chronic shame the serious attention it deserves, integrating new brain science with an inclusive tradition of relational psychotherapy. She looks behind the myriad symptoms of shame to its relational essence. As DeYoung describes how chronic shame is wired into the brain and developed in personality, she clarifies complex concepts and makes them available for everyday therapy practice. Grounded in clinical experience and alive with case examples, Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame is highly readable and immediately helpful. Patricia A. DeYoung’s clear, engaging writing helps readers recognize the presence of shame in the therapy room, think through its origins and effects in their clients’ lives, and decide how best to work with those clients. Therapists will find that Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame enhances the scope of their practice and efficacy with this client group, which comprises a large part of most therapy practices. Challenging, enlightening, and nourishing, this book belongs in the library of every shame-aware therapist.

Can you be a self on your own or only together with others? Is selfhood a built-in feature of experience or rather socially constructed? How do we at all come to understand others? Does empathy amount to and allow for a distinct experiential acquaintance with others, and if so, what does that tell us about the nature of selfhood and social cognition? Does a strong emphasis on the first-personal character of consciousness prohibit a satisfactory account of intersubjectivity or is the former rather a necessary requirement for the latter? Engaging with debates and findings in classical phenomenology, in philosophy of mind and in various empirical disciplines, Dan Zahavi's new book Self and Other offers answers to these questions. Discussing such diverse topics as self-consciousness, phenomenal externalism, mindless coping, mirror self-recognition, autism, theory of mind, embodied simulation, joint attention, shame, time-consciousness, embodiment, narrativity, self-disorders, expressivity and Buddhist no-self accounts, Zahavi argues that any theory of consciousness that wishes to take the subjective dimension of our experiential life serious must endorse a minimalist notion of self. At the same time, however, he also contends that an adequate account of the self has to recognize its multifaceted character, and that various complementary accounts must be integrated, if we are to do justice to its complexity. Thus, while arguing that the most fundamental level of selfhood is not socially constructed and not constitutively dependent upon others, Zahavi also acknowledges that there are dimensions of the self and types of self-experience that are other-mediated. The final part of the book exemplifies this claim through a close analysis of shame.

Shame influences more of our thoughts and actions than many other emotions. Used as a punishment for bad behavior, shame acts as an incentive for us to behave in socially acceptable ways. As a common method used to regulate children's behavior, shame is by far one of the most pervasive socializing agents. Many of our more persistent, punitive, and critical feelings about ourselves stem from humiliations in early childhood even if we don't remember the specific events that prompted them. While we all experience shame from time to time, when shame becomes toxic, it can play a central role in our life-long development and functioning. At its worst, shame can become a devastating attack on one's personhood and a threat to the integrity of the self. Many books on shame and the process of healing have been written, but few have been written specifically from a psychodynamic depth psychology perspective. It is intended that The Trauma of Shame and The Making of the Self will make an important contribution to that effort. Shelley Stokes, PhD, and Sherron Lewis, LMFT Authors of Letting Go and Taking the Chance to be Real (Lewis and Stokes 2017)

This is a revolutionary book about the nature of emotion, about the way emotions are triggered in our private moments, in our relations with others, and by our biology. Drawing on every theme of the modern life sciences, Dr. Nathanson shows how the nine basic affects--interest-excitement, enjoyment-joy, surprise-startle, fear-terror, distress-anguish, anger-rage, dissmell, disgust, and shame-humiliation--not only determine how we feel but shape our very sense of self. For too long there has been a battle between those who explain emotional discomfort on the basis of lived experience and those who blame chemistry. As Dr. Nathanson shows, chemicals and illnesses can affect our mood just as surely as an uncomfortable memory or a stern rebuke. He presents a completely new understanding of all emotion, providing the first link between the exciting affect theory of Silvan Tomkins and the entire world of biology, medicine, psychology, psychotherapy, religion, and the social sciences. Shame is the least understood of the painful emotions, although it affects every phase of life. We have all been made to feel foolish just at the moment we most wanted to appear wonderful; we have all been rebuffed by those we wished to court. Not one of us looks exactly as we might wish. Shame haunts our every dream of love, and influences how we experience ourselves as sexual beings. We react to shame by withdrawing, by making painful alliances with those who humiliate us, by calling attention to what brings us pride, or by attacking whoever has made us feel inferior. The comedian, as Nathanson shows in his discussion of Buddy Hackett, makes us laugh at what we try to keep hidden, transforming shame intoacceptance and even pride. This book explains everything that can possibly make us proud or ashamed. All are in this book; nobody who reads it will be quite the same again.

He traces the precursors of a sense of self in infancy and early childhood, and describes the consequences of shame which goes unacknowledged, such as sadness, rage, or depression. Lewis also explores the many ways in which shame is induced and expressed, reflecting on the broader implications of these differences--for instance, the divergence, early in life, of men's and women's experiences of and responses to shame; he finds that women are more ashamed, more of the time. Cultures, Lewis argues, are shaped by the ways in which children are taught to deal with shame. What many have seen as a rise in narcissism in contemporary America, following years of emphasis on self-actualization and personal freedom as opposed to commitment and community is associated with an increase in shame. Narcissism is in some sense the ultimate attempt to avoid shame, albeit a doomed one. Lewis shows how approaches to shame differ not only among cultures, but religions as well.

This volume reports on the growing body of knowledge on shame and guilt, integrating findings from the authors' original research program with other data emerging from social, clinical, personality, and developmental psychology. Evidence is presented to demonstrate that these universally experienced affective phenomena have significant implications for many aspects of human functioning, with particular relevance for interpersonal relationships. --From publisher's description.