"If you're tired, you're poor, and you're a huddled mass of an assistant yearning to breathe free, look no further than Save the Assistants." --Yahoo! "Lilit at Save the Assistants . . . feels your pain." --Marie Claire What happens when nine-to-five turns into nine-to-eleven? How do you outmaneuver the office Underminer? Is it appropriate to have a cocktail at a company lunch? How do you get reservations for a restaurant with an unlisted phone number? What do you do when your boss throws a stapler at your head? As Page Six Magazine recently noted, bosses are "going from mean to monstrous -- and making The Devil Wears Prada look like a love story." What's an office drone to do? Call on Save the Assistants, the addictive and insightful guide to workplace sanity by Lilit Marcus, renowned assistant expert. On your first day at work, you learned how to answer the phone and turn on the computer. But four years of college hardly prepared you for the coffee-fetching, back-stabbing, and you-should-have-done-it-yesterdays of office life. Save the Assistants is here to help you not only survive your job, but ultimately get the career you want.

Real life tools and advice for every professional assistant and their high-powered employers. A first-hand look at the world of a celebrity assistant, and its application to the larger realm of all professional assistants.

From the Hollywood assistant trenches, a hilarious guide to surviving life at the bottom of the totem pole. I will not make you sort my M&Ms by color. I will not take off four hours in the middle of the day to go shopping and then announce upon my return that “it’s going to be a late one—we need to catch up!” I will not request that you create and maintain my online dating profile. Welcome to the wickedly funny world of To My Assistant, where overworked and underappreciated assistants finally get their due. We’ve all been there. You might even be there right now. Do you depend upon your college education to handle crucial business decisions such as memorizing your boss’ lunch order, trying to schedule four meetings where only one can go, and helping your boss detag Facebook photos? Or what about those awesome days when you’re instructed to “send me that thing from a week ago,” “call that guy I wanted to call,” or “book me a table at that restaurant that girl said was really good,” and are then berated when you’re not able to figure out immediately what your boss is talking about? To My Assistant compiles everything that disgruntled and optimistic assistants everywhere promise NEVER TO DO when, one day, they have assistants of their own. From ridiculous requests and backhanded compliments to outright insults, and complete with helpful tips and tricks for Boss Wrangling—like what you can learn about your boss’s mood from his meal choices, how to navigate such professional minefields as requests for your opinion and interactions with your boss’s children and pets, and advanced translation techniques for incoherent e-mails and text messages—these pages are just what the underpaid masses need to survive (and laugh at) the daily injustices of life at the bottom of the totem pole.

Series I: Contains the formal reports, both Union and Confederate, of the first seizures of United States property in the Southern States, and of all military operations in the field, with the correspondence, orders, and returns relating specially thereto, and, as proposed is to be accompanied by an Atlas. In this series the reports will be arranged according to the campaigns and several theaters of operations (in the chronological order of the events), and the Union reports of any event will, as a rule, be immediately followed by the Confederate accounts. The correspondence, etc., not embraced in the "reports" proper will follow (first Union and next Confederate) in chronological order. Volume XIV. 1885. (Vol. 14, Chap. 26) Chapter XXVI - Operations on the coasts of South Carolina, Georgia, and Middle and East Florida. Apr 12, 1862-Jun 11, 1863.