Visitors to the great Scottish metropolis of Glasgow are often puzzled by the colourful patois of the local citizens. A conversation about the weather opens with the mysterious phrase, 'Scummindooninbuckets'. In a bar your companions, apparently of Russian origin, greet each other with the names 'Amfurrahoff ', 'Giezahoff ' and 'Seezahoff '. You overhear a young damsel in the arms of her lover utter the ancient Celtic endearment, 'Takyurhonaffmabum'. At a Hogmanay party you offer the hostess a packet of wine-gums, and she thanks you in the lilting language of her Hebridean ancestors: 'Meanjiolbampoat! ' All at sea? Don't despair! Professor Stanley Baxter is here to teach you all you need to know about the rich Glaswegian tongue in this omnibus edition of his legendary language course, Parliamo Glasgow. Now illustrated with hilarious drawings by Bob Dewar, this guide will replace your confusion with complete understanding - and tears of laughter.

The Scots have a unique way of communicating their feelings. Their sayings are cheeky, to the point, rude and always funny. Scotland's bestselling humour author is back with his latest collection of hilarious Scottish sayings.'Away an' bile yer heid an' mak silly soup!'That wan's in everything but the Co-operative windae!''If ah had your money ah wid burn ma ain''Ye've goat a heid oan ye like a stair-heid''The gemme's a bogie''Yer cruisin' fur a bruisin'''Ah'm that hungry ah could eat a scabbie-heided horse''Castor oil cures everythin' but a widden leg''Wan minute yer a peacock an' the next yer a feather duster''Yer talkin' mince withoot a tattie in sight''Lang may yer lum reek, an' may a wee moose never leave yer kitchen press wi' a tear in its ee''Yer herr's mingin', hingin' an' clingin''From the infallible wisdom of the Glesca Granny, to the hilarious patter of larger-than-life conductress Big Aggie MacDonald, Allan Morrison has a sharp eye and a silver tongue when it comes to observational humour.SCOTLAND ON SUNDAY on Haud Ma Chips, Ah've Drapped the Wean!

Glasgow: The Autobiography tells the story of the fabled, former Second City of the British Empire from its origins as a bucolic village on the rivers Kelvin and Clyde, through the tumult of the Industrial Revolution to the third millennium. Including extracts from an astonishing array of contributors from Daniel Defoe, Dorothy Wordsworth and Dr Johnson to Evelyn Waugh and Dirk Bogarde, it also features the writing of bred-in-thebone Glaswegians such as Alasdair Gray, Liz Lochhead, James Kelman and 2020 Booker prize-winner Douglas Stuart. The result is a varied and vivid portrait of one of the world's great cities in all its grime and glory – a place which is at once infuriating, inspiring, raucous, humourful and never, ever dull.

A popular and informative guide to the Scots language in the best-selling Gem format. Contains words and phrases from both literary and everyday language, this is the perfect wee dictionary of Scots for native and non-native speakers alike. First published in 1995, the Collins Gem Scots Dictionary is by far the most popular guide to the language of today's Scotland, with nearly 1800 everyday words and phrases from all over Scotland clearly explained and with lots of helpful examples of usage. Colour text makes this best-selling dictionary even more user-friendly. With its durable and eye-catching cover, this is a must for every bookshelf!

A series of chance encounters leads to a sizzling new romance from the New York Times bestselling author of the On Dublin Street series. The universe is conspiring against Ava Breevort. As if flying back to Phoenix to bury a childhood friend wasn't hell enough, a cloud of volcanic ash traveling from overseas delayed her flight back home to Boston. Her last ditch attempt to salvage the trip was thwarted by an arrogant Scotsman, Caleb Scott, who steals a first class seat out from under her. Then over the course of their journey home, their antagonism somehow lands them in bed for the steamiest layover Ava's ever had. And that's all it was--until Caleb shows up on her doorstep. When pure chance pulls Ava back into Caleb's orbit, he proposes they enjoy their physical connection while he's stranded in Boston. Ava agrees, knowing her heart's in no danger since a) she barely likes Caleb and b) his existence in her life is temporary. Not long thereafter Ava realizes she's made a terrible error because as it turns out Caleb Scott isn't quite so unlikeable after all. When his stay in Boston becomes permanent, Ava must decide whether to fight her feelings for him or give into them. But even if she does decide to risk her heart on Caleb, there is no guarantee her stubborn Scot will want to risk his heart on her....

Think quickly on your feet: be smooth, funny, and clever – all at once. Goodbye awkward silences, hello conversational agility! No matter where you lie on the spectrum of awkward to engaging, witty banter is always the end goal – and it should be. Witty banter, and all the steps that lead to it, allows you to (1) disarm and connect with anyone, (2) immediately exit boring small talk mode, and (3) instantly build rapport like you’re old friends. Flow with the conversational twists and turns like water. The Art of Witty Banter carefully examines the art, nuance, and mechanics of banter and charm to make you witty comeback machine, the likes of which your friends have never seen. You’ll be able to handle, defend, disarm, and engage others in a way that makes you comfortable and confident with each growing day. Transform "interview" conversations into comfortable rapport. Patrick King is an internationally bestselling author and Social Skills and Conversation Coach. As someone who teaches people to speak for a living, he’s broken wit and banter down to a science and given you real guidelines on what to say and when. Make a sharp, smart, and savvy impression – every time. There’s no guesswork here – you’ll get exact examples and phrases to plug into your daily conversations. 18 specific points to up your charisma quotient. How will you be clever, be quick, and be interesting? •Why the questions you use make people freeze. •How to master teasing, witty comebacks, and initiating jokes and humor. •What free association is and how it makes you quick-witted. •How to create an instant “in-group” and inside joke with someone.

No more blanking or awkward silences. No more running out of things to say and struggling to keep others engaged. (1) Conversation isn’t scripted, (2) it’s 100% unpredictable, and (3) it can be terrifying at times. How do you prepare for such a thing? By learning how to apply improv comedy techniques to roll with any punch and improve your conversations and social interactions. Become quicker and more clever in daily conversation. Improv(e) Your Conversations teaches the ingenious rules of improv comedy that allow performers to turn boring prompts into memorable interactions worthy of standing ovations. This means there are real frameworks and templates to escape interview mode small talk – and start connecting and building rapport from the moment you say “Hello.” This book goes through over 15 of the most helpful and insightful improv comedy techniques with countless real-life examples to make you a great talker. Learn the conversational secrets of the world’s best comedians. Patrick King is an internationally bestselling author and social skills coach. His writing draws of a variety of sources, from scientific research, academic experience, coaching, and real life experience. Over 15 actionable tips that are actually practical and relateable. •The three easy ways to always know what to say, even when your mind goes blank. •What Sherlock Holmes has to do with great rapport. •How to read people better and what to look for. •The one goal you must always keep in mind (that you probably don’t even know). Adapt, witty comeback, reply, and charm in record time. •What causes awkward silences and how to prevent them. •How your conversation should resemble a movie. •How to “flip the switch” to be more entertaining.

'Welsh is at the top of his game' The Face 'His most readable and memorable novel since Trainspotting' Independent on Sunday Glue is the story of four boys growing up in the Edinburgh schemes, and about the loyalties, the experiences and the secrets that hold them together into their thirties. As we follow their lives from the 70s into the new century - from punk to techno, from speed to Es - we can see each of them trying to struggle out from under the weight of the conditioning of class and culture, peer pressure and their parents' hopes that maybe their sons will do better than they did. What binds the four of them is the friendship formed by the scheme, their school, and their ambition to escape from both; their loyalty fused in street morality: back up your mates, don't hit women and, most importantly, never grass - on anyone. 'His most complete and engaging work to date... arguably, his best book' TLS 'A coming-of-age story carved out with a broken bottle' Elle