What's wrong with Europe? Ignoring the fact that the EU is a grotesque, officious money sucking totalitarian machine that devours national sovereignty and pukes out unwanted, unwelcome and intrusive legislation, there's a whole variety of other reasons including: Shops that open at 10am and close at 4pm - with a two-hour lunch break in between. Oompah bands. Restaurant staff with the manners of a gibbon and the sense of urgency of a sloth. Parisians. Police forces who are the bastard offspring of the Gestapo and the Stasi. The whole concept of 'mañana. 'National costumes that are as preposterous as they are pointless. Polish spelling. Drivers who view speed limits as targets rather than warnings. Yodelling. Bouzouki music. Street signs that are a homage to small typography rather than an actual guide to your location. Donkey abuse. Women who act under the misguided idea that armpit hair is remotely sexy. The 24hr clock. Using a comma as a decimal point. Father Abraham and the Smurfs. Eurodisco. Eurozone. Eurotrash. Eurovision. Anything else preceded by the word 'Euro' (apart from Euro sceptic). The Cheeky Girls. This is less of a guidebook and more of a warning...

This original and innovative study offers the reader an inventive analysis of Shakespeare in performance.

What's ILL in one place can be WACK in another, or the same word can actually have TOTES different meanings. It's CRAY CRAY! From KEWL girls hitting on HENCH boys to wannabe gangstas hangin' with their DOGGS in the ENDZ, teen slang can leave NOOBS CONFUZZLED. If you want to appear DOPE or just want to know WTF is going on, How to Talk Teen is the ultimate guide! Bugly : Short for butt ugly; exceeded on the ugly ranking by dugly and fugly. Pfun: More than mere fun. This is pure fun. Rando: A random person who appears at parties but who no one seems to know, let alone invited. Hiberdating: Disappearing from view because you're spending almost all your time with your new boyfriend/girlfriend. Nodel: Someone who thinks they look like a model . . . but nobody else does. Rentsy: Acting like parents, i.e. acting responsibly or demonstrating a nauseating taste in music. Mis-wave: To wave back at someone you think is waving at you, but who was actually waving to someone else. Ugly radius: The distance from you that someone stops looking attractive. Hot mess: Someone attractive who looks cool and in control, but who's an emotional train wreck. Lipsin: Kissing energetically - but less aggressively than a full-on snog. Selfie claw: Your contorted hand as you simultaneously hold your phone and take the photo. Air Five: High-five greeting to someone from across a room. Endz: The street where you live or the immediate neighbourhood. Pit stick: Underarm antiperspirant/deodorant. Top bantz: Particularly insightful or mocking banter. Hashtag Douchebag: A moron who uses hashtags excessively in anything they type in an attempt to be witty

Cloud Cover transports us more than one hundred and fifty years into the future, to a dystopian world where Motte has lived alone on an arid, mountain island since roughly aged eleven. She is beginning to suspect she could even be the last human survivor - when events abruptly prove her wrong. Blending sci-fi drama with fantasy and thriller, it portrays the struggles of a small, disparate group of individuals who initially share little except the will to survive against all odds. With the backdrop of earth's climate under siege plus danger from enemy forces who still retain vestiges of more advanced technologies, their interrelationships develop in complex, unpredictable and sometimes touchingly humorous ways.

Julia Buckley needs a miracle. Like a third of the UK population, she has a chronic pain condition. According to her doctors, it can't be cured. She doesn't believe them. She does believe in miracles, though. It's just a question of tracking one down. Julia's search for a cure takes her on a global quest, exploring the boundaries between science, psychology and faith with practitioners on the fringes of conventional, traditional and alternative medicine. From neuroplastic brain rewiring in San Francisco to medical marijuana in Colorado, Haitian vodou rituals to Brazilian 'spiritual surgery', she's willing to try anything. Can miracles happen? And more importantly, what happens next if they do? Raising vital questions about the modern medical system, this is also a story about identity in a system historically skewed against 'hysterical' female patients, and the struggle to retain a sense of self under the medical gaze. Heal Me explains why modern medicine's current approach to chronic pain is failing patients. It explores the importance of faith, hope and cynicism, and examines our relationships with our doctors, our beliefs and ourselves.

In Paris, there is a café, elegantly furnished with polished wooden tables and an awning of striped gold and green, whose walls are filled with vintage posters advertising drinks such as Green Fairy Liqueur, Mermaid Madeira and Red Devil Lemonade. And sitting on the bar is a large, silver, steam-powered espresso coffee machine.The café is owned by Monsieur Moutarde, and Monsieur Moutarde has made the most extraordinary discovery. With the help of his friend, Madame Pamplemousse, he has created a time-travel machine (for that is what the espresso coffee machine is). Very special, highly flavoured, intense ingredients are fed into the machine, where they are subatomically blended with quantum froth and space-time foam. The resulting liquid looks like a small black coffee but in fact transports the drinker through time and space. But this is a dangerous invention. For who knows what would happen if it fell into the wrong hands? Before long, Monsieur Moutarde, Madame Pamplemousse, her cat, Camembert, and her friend, Madeleine, are on the run through space and time to capture a T. rex's freshly caught drool and the tears of the rare sphinx - vital ingredients for a tonic that will both save them and revive the ailing spirit of Paris. A magical romp that will charm and delight.

Amritsar, India, 1919. A city on the verge of meltdown, as tensions between the local people and the British colonial rulers explode. 12-year-old Arjan Singh learns that his father has been falsely charged with serious crimes and faces hanging. But there has been a terrible massacre in the city, as British troops fired on unarmed Indians, and the city is under curfew. Anger and fear have left the population seething and danger lurks around every corner. Arjan sets out on a perilous mission to save his father, in the face of armed troops, martial curfew, and vicious local bandits. Can he escape and get to his father before it's too late?

Kazusa is determined to tell Izumi she likes him, and the staged reading the Literature Club will perform for the school festival provides ample inspiration. All the while, Nina is coming to her own conclusions about how nice Izumi is, how thoughtful he is, how easy it is to talk to him… With the festival as their backdrop, each girl begins to write her own definition of what “love” might really mean.

When Jessica gets roped into the school musical she finds herself strangely allied with arch-enemy Amelia when her best friend Natalie becomes crazed with stardom. Meanwhile, Jessica's dad is concerned at plans to build a new road through nearby parkland and is now living up a tree. So far, so normal

SOLDIER. OUTCAST. HUSBAND. HERO. Award-winning author CHUCK BROWN (Bitter Root, Aquamen) and dynamic illustrator GEORGE KAMBADAIS (DISNEY’S GARGOYLES) present a bold vision of a classic science-fiction hero! It is the year 1919. An asteroid of pure Ninth hurtles towards Earth. Its power slowly melds the people of Earth to Mars, and Mars to Earth. John Carter is ripped from everything he knows, powerless and confused, suddenly in battle with Martian Apes... in Virginia! Strap in for full-octane adventure... in JOHN CARTER OF MARS! Collects JOHN CARTER OF MARS #1–5 with a complete cover gallery!