Defies the myth that parents must sacrific themselves. Instead, shows them how to reclaim their power, balance, happiness...and lives. When kids turn to substance abuse, parents also become victims as they watch their children transform into irrational and antisocial individuals. This harrowing scenario finds parents buckling beneath the stress--often with catastrophoric consequences: Divorce, career upsets, breakdowns and worse. "Don't Let Your Kids Kill You" is a landmark work that dares focus on the plight of the confused, distressed parent and not the erring child. It sets aside any preconceived ideas that parents are to blame for what is essentially a full-blown global crisis. Drawing on interviews with parents who've survived the heartbreak of kids on drugs, combined with his own experience, Charles Rubin provides practical advice on how parents can help themselves and their families by first attending to their own needs. Liberation begins when you open this book.

How do you take charge of your health and stop turning over your life to our confusing and intimidating healthcare system before it’s too late? Dr. Erika Schwartz believes that today’s patient is but a leaf blowing in the wind of group-think protocols, corrupt medical societies, insurance companies on the take, and billion dollars in marketing and lobbying pressure from drug companies. What is the quick fix? The answers are here in the ten clear chapters, giving examples every step of the way. It’s a simple process that takes you, the patient, from being a victim to being in charge. Developing personal self-confidence, choosing the right doctor for you, walking out on the wrong ones with impunity and making the right choices will add up to great health care with you at the center. Follow the plan and the facts and change your life and that of your loved ones. Life is to be enjoyed not feared. This book will put enjoyment back into your life and remove the fear and intimidation from your healthcare.

"You are not Codependent simply because your adult child is an addict or alcoholic." All parents of addicted children of any age are terrified, confused, feel out of control, lose sleep, dread the phone calls at 3:00 in the morning. This book is for parents who are "Afraid to Let Go" because they do not know how to set boundaries with their adult children without feeling crippling anxiety, or walling themselves off to make separation possible. You can't "let go." You can't "detach with love." You can't let them "hit bottom." You can't seem to implement the strategies you have learned when you are faced with your adult child's chaos and anxiety. When you try to do this, it makes you physically and emotionally ill, and the anxiety and fear becomes unbearable. "Why can't you just "let go"? " If you are struggling with Codependency, your relationship with your child is not be the only relationship where you experience a loss of self, over-reactivity, adrenalin rushes when you feel "out of control," or behave intrusively or impulsively to "help" in situations even when your assistance has not been requested. If you are Codependent, this is not the first relationship in which you have "over-given" and then felt resentful, or sacrificed yourself to give someone what you decided they "needed" because if you don't, "who will"? "Afraid to Let Go" explores the developmental origins of Codependency that lead to painful behavioral reactivity in response to our addicted adult children. Afraid to Let Go then connects the chronic stress of the chaos of addiction with adrenal system damage, and points you toward concrete behavioral changes you can make to heal regardless of the sobriety of your adult child. "About the author: " Mary Crocker Cook, D.Min., LMFT, CADCII is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with extensive experience working with addicted families over the last 20 years. She is the author of ""Awakening Hope. A Developmental, Behavioral and Biological Approach to Codependency Treatment,"" and coordinates the Alcohol and Drug Studies Program at San Jose City College in San Jose, California.

How to recognize and cope with Parent Frustration Syndrome (PFS): negative thoughts and feelings about your children"

“Constructive wallowing” seems like an oxymoron. Constructive is a good thing, but wallowing is bad. Right? But wait a minute; is it really so terrible to give ourselves a time-out to feel our feelings? Or is it possible that wallowing is an act of loving kindness, right when we need it most? Just about everyone loves the idea of self-compassion -- the notion that maybe in spite of our messy emotions and questionable behavior, we really aren’t all that bad. In recent years there’s been an explosion of books that encourage readers to stop beating themselves up for being human, which is terrific. Unfortunately, readers who aren’t interested in Buddhism or meditation have been left out in the cold. Self-compassion is an everyday habit that everyone can learn, even if they a) aren't particularly spiritual, b) find most books about self-compassion too serious, or else c) have already overdosed on meditation. Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them is the first book to cut right to the chase, bypassing descriptions of Eastern philosophy and meditation techniques to teach readers exactly how to accept and feel their feelings with self-compassion for greater emotional health and well-being … while making them laugh from time to time. It seems that the wisdom of “keeping your friends close and your enemies closer” applies to emotions as well as people. It’s tempting to turn away from menacing, uncomfortable feelings like anger, grief or regret and treat them like unwanted guests; however, ignoring them just seems to make them stick around. They lurk in the background like punks with switchblades, waiting to pounce as soon as they see an opening. By learning to accept and embrace, rather than suppress, difficult feelings, people can keep their sense of personal power and, better yet, gain greater understanding and ultimately esteem for themselves. Feeling bad can actually lead to feeling better, faster!

Are you struggling to connect with your child now that they've left the nest? Are you feeling the tension and heartache as your relationship dynamic begins to change? In Doing Life with Your Adult Children, bestselling author and parenting expert Jim Burns provides practical advice and hopeful encouragement for navigating this tough yet rewarding transition. If you've raised a child, you know that parenting doesn't stop when they turn eighteen. In many ways, your relationship gets even more complicated--your heart and your head are as involved as ever, but you can feel things shifting, whether your child lives under your roof or rarely stays in contact. Doing Life with Your Adult Children helps you navigate this rich and challenging season of parenting. Speaking from his own personal and professional experience, Burns offers practical answers to the most common questions he's received over the years, including: My child's choices are breaking my heart--where did I go wrong? Is it OK to give advice to my grown child? What's the difference between enabling and helping? What boundaries should I have if my child moves back home? What do I do when my child doesn't seem to be maturing into adulthood? How do I relate to my grown child's significant other? What does it mean to have healthy financial boundaries? How can I support my grown children when I don't support their values? Including positive principles on bringing kids back to faith, ideas on how to leave a legacy as a grandparent, and encouragement for every changing season, Doing Life with Your Adult Children is a unique book on your changing role in a calling that never ends.

The family recovery classic, Addict in the Family, has been revised and updated to offer parents and other family members even greater support when faced with the reality of a loved one’s addiction. Solid, actionable advice and information about what helps and what doesn’t—and how to care for themselves—make this an indispensable guide. For families of addicts, fear, shame, and confusion over a loved one’s addiction can cause deep anxiety, sleepless nights, and even physical illness. The emotional distress family members suffer is often compounded by the belief that they somehow caused or contributed to their loved one’s addiction—or that they could have done something to prevent it. Addict in the Family is a book about the pain of addiction, but more importantly it is a book of comfort, understanding, and hope for anyone struggling with a loved one’s addiction. As the compelling personal stories reveal, family members do not cause their loved one’s addiction—nor can they control or cure it. What family members can do is find support, set boundaries, detach with love, and eventually discover how to enjoy life more fully. This book helps them do just that—whether the loved one achieves recovery or not.

A book that gives parents permission to let go of their adult children's problems and reclaim their lives.

National expert Dr. Joseph Lee explains the nature of youth addiction and treatment, and how families can create a safe and supportive environment for their loved ones during treatment and throughout their recovery. Raising a child is tough as it is, but when your kid becomes addicted to alcohol or other drugs, it can feel as if you’re living a nightmare. You’re not alone. In Recovering My Kid, Dr. Joseph Lee, a leading youth addiction specialist, takes worried, confused, and angry parents by the hand and addresses their most pressing questions and fears: What is addiction? What happens when my child returns home from treatment? How can my family support his or her recovery? What if my child relapses? How can my family get well again?Getting your child and your family well again requires the support and understanding of the whole family, even if feelings and trust were damaged. In his engaging and straightforward style, Lee explains the difficult concepts of addiction, treatment, and recovery in a way parents and families can understand and gives them concrete strategies they can put into practice.This book will help family members begin to understand what their loved one is going through and how they can help the addict adjust to a clean-and-sober life while still taking care of themselves.

Explains how to receive better service from an HMO while building a good doctor-patient relationship, avoiding red tape, and protecting vulnerable patients, including children and the elderly.