Unwillingly taken for outings in the snow by their fathers, a boy and an ice elf meet by chance.

David Sedaris's beloved holiday collection is new again with six more pieces, including a never before published story. Along with such favoritesas the diaries of a Macy's elf and the annals of two very competitive families, are Sedaris's tales of tardy trick-or-treaters ("Us and Them"); the difficulties of explaining the Easter Bunny to the French ("Jesus Shaves"); what to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm ("Let It Snow"); the puzzling Christmas traditions of other nations ("Six to Eight Black Men"); what Halloween at the medical examiner's looks like ("The Monster Mash"); and a barnyard secret Santa scheme gone awry ("Cow and Turkey"). No matter what your favorite holiday, you won't want to miss celebrating it with the author who has been called "one of the funniest writers alive" (Economist).

A collection of surprising, disarming and 'extremely funny' essays from the internationally bestselling author of Me Talk Pretty One Day (Sunday Times) Santaland Diaries collects six of David Sedaris's most profound Christmas stories into one slender volume perfect for use as a last-minute coaster or ice-scraper. This drinking man's companion can be enjoyed by the warmth of a raging fire, the glow of a brilliantly decorated tree, or even in the back seat of a police car. It should be read with your eyes, felt with your heart, and heard only when spoken to. It should, in short, behave much like a book. And oh, what a book it is! 'Sedaris writes with a gentle but unfailing acuity and a keen eye for the ridiculous ... extremely funny' -Sunday Times

Activities for celebrating secular and sacred seasons of the year For use in churches, schools, camps, at home Many of our experiences in life happen when several generations are together— at church, at home, in our communities. Holidays and family events are times for celebration, learning, rituals, food, and fun. This edition of Faithful Celebrations focuses on the months of January and February, when secular holidays can become times to think about how we live out the gospel message in celebrating national holidays with more than a day off from school or sending a greeting card. Each event to be celebrated includes key ideas; a cluster of activities to experience the key ideas; a list of materials needed; full instructions for implementation; background history and information; music; art; recipes; and prayer resources to use in a small, intimate, or large multi-generational group. For children, youth, adults, or any combination of ages, any of these activities can take place in any setting. Faithful Celebrations: Making Time for God in Winter includes New Year’s Day, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Super Bowl Sunday, Valentine’s Day, and Snow days.

About the series: For over two thousand years the legend of Santa Claus has endured. His is a Mission of peace as outlined in the Magi Charter, given to the first Santa by the Child. From humble beginnings, following that First Christmas, the Santa lineage has been passed down through the ages. This epic adventure tells the story of those Santas from the founding of the North Pole and the origin of the ancient elves, to our modern times where the world's problems affect even those in the secluded complex of the North, and concluding in the distant future which finds Santa and the elves committed to their mission on a galactic scale where Christmas traditions are barely recognizable. In every era, those committed to the Mission must find a way to deliver that which is needed most to those most deserving. The Elf Coup: It was foreseen that this would be a difficult year for the North Pole. Multiple crises threaten the complex as well as individual elves. Santa Claus is missing somewhere in the human world as are the elves sent to find him. The creature Krampus wreaks havoc on the North Pole bringing elf work to a halt. Mistletoe Green seizes the opportunity to carry out his own diabolical plans for power. The retired elves have their own secrets that will unlock more mysteries of the North Pole, vital for certain young elves which everything depends on. Noel alone must face Mistletoe, but first he will need to master the elfin Runes and that means surviving the training of an ancient elf's teachings...

"David Sedaris's ability to transform the mortification of everyday life into wildly entertaining art," (The Christian Science Monitor) is elevated to wilder and more entertaining heights than ever in this remarkable new book. Trying to make coffee when the water is shut off, David considers using the water in a vase of flowers and his chain of associations takes him from the French countryside to a hilariously uncomfortable memory of buying drugs in a mobile home in rural North Carolina. In essay after essay, Sedaris proceeds from bizarre conundrums of daily life-having a lozenge fall from your mouth into the lap of a fellow passenger on a plane or armoring the windows with LP covers to protect the house from neurotic songbirds-to the most deeply resonant human truths. Culminating in a brilliant account of his venture to Tokyo in order to quit smoking, David Sedaris's sixth essay collection is a new masterpiece of comic writing from "a writer worth treasuring" (Seattle Times). Praise for When You Are Engulfed in Flames: "Older, wiser, smarter and meaner, Sedaris...defies the odds once again by delivering an intelligent take on the banalities of an absurd life." --Kirkus Reviews This latest collection proves that not only does Sedaris still have it, but he's also getting better....Sedaris's best stuff will still--after all this time--move, surprise, and entertain." --Booklist Table of Contents: It's Catching Keeping Up The Understudy This Old House Buddy, Can You Spare a Tie? Road Trips What I Learned That's Amore The Monster Mash In the Waiting Room Solutions to Saturday's Puzzle Adult Figures Charging Toward a Concrete Toadstool Memento Mori All the Beauty You Will Ever Need Town and Country Aerial The Man in the Hut Of Mice and Men April in Paris Crybaby Old Faithful The Smoking Section

The brand-new HEARTWARMINGLY HILARIOUS children’s picture book from NUMBER ONE bestselling David Walliams. Illustrated by artistic genius Tony Ross.

A guy walks into a bar car and... From here the story could take many turns. When this guy is David Sedaris, the possibilities are endless, but the result is always the same: he will both delight you with twists of humor and intelligence and leave you deeply moved. Sedaris remembers his father's dinnertime attire (shirtsleeves and underpants), his first colonoscopy (remarkably pleasant), and the time he considered buying the skeleton of a murdered Pygmy. With Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls, David Sedaris shows once again why his work has been called "hilarious, elegant, and surprisingly moving" (Washington Post).

Classroom-tested ideas! Around-the-curriculum activities are organized into imaginative units. A great resource for implementing a child-directed program. Children learn best when all their senses are activated and involved. 8 1/2"x11".