Couples in Conflict describes the nature of the emotional processes leading to difficulties and how a minister/ counselor can be a resource to help couples in conflict. The minister/counselor will be able to help them improve their lives personally, as well as their relationship and family life. By extension, couples will also develop skills that will improve their work life and their life in community. The book provides practical and specific approaches to helping these couples and the issues that a minister must deal with in order to be useful to them.

How do you counsel a couple that is heading for divorce by the time they seek help? Building on the research presented in their previous book Family Therapies, Mark Yarhouse and James Sells have developed a resource to train pastors and counselors in restoring high conflict relationships.

You hear and read a lot about ways to improve your relationship. But if you've tried these without much success, you're not alone. Many highly reactive couples—pairs that are quick to argue, anger, and blame—need more than just the run-of-the-mill relationship advice to solve their problems in love. When destructive emotions are at the heart of problems in your relationship, no amount of effective communication or intimacy building will fix what ails it. If you're part of a "high-conflict" couple, you need to get control of your emotions first, to stop making things worse, and only then work on building a better relationship. The High-Conflict Couple adapts the powerful techniques of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) into skills you can use to tame out-of-control emotions that flare up in your relationship. Using mindfulness and distress tolerance techniques, you'll learn how to deescalate angry situations before they have a chance to explode into destructive fights. Other approaches will help you disclose your fears, longings, and other vulnerabilities to your partner and validate his or her experiences in return. You'll discover ways to manage problems with negotiation, not conflict, and to find true acceptance and closeness with the person you love the most. This book has been awarded The Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies Self-Help Seal of Merit — an award bestowed on outstanding self-help books that are consistent with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) principles and that incorporate scientifically tested strategies for overcoming mental health difficulties. Used alone or in conjunction with therapy, our books offer powerful tools readers can use to jump-start changes in their lives.

FIND HAPPINESS AND FULFILLMENT THROUGH — RATHER THAN DESPITE — YOUR DIFFERENCES Dr. James Creighton has worked with couples for decades, facilitating communication and conflict resolution and teaching them the tools to build healthy, happy relationships. He has found that many couples start out believing they like the same things, see people the same way, and share a united take on the world. But inevitably differences crop up, and it can be profoundly discouraging to find that one's partner sees a person, situation, or decision completely differently. Although many relationships flounder at this point, Creighton shows that this can actually be an opportunity to forge stronger ties. In Loving through Your Differences, he draws on the latest research in cognitive science and developmental psychology to show how we invent our realities with our perceptual minds. He then provides clear, concrete tools for shifting our perceptions and reframing our responses. The result moves couples out of the fear and alienation of "your way or my way" and into a deep understanding of the other that allows for an "our way." As Creighton shows, this way of being together, based on the reality of individuality rather than the illusion of sameness, sets the stage for long-term excitement, discovery, and fulfillment.

The Four Laws of Love represents the culmination of Jimmy Evans’ influential career. In this deeply personal book, Jimmy Evans outlines the foundational pillars upon which God designed marriage. Without holding back, he tells the story of his own marriage, which was hurtling toward divorce until this self-proclaimed “bad husband” came to recognize and put into practice these four laws. This book sounds a wake-up call for every kind of marriage, including those that are barely surviving and those that seem to operate on autopilot. Couples who follow these simple guidelines ― recognizing the original intent and purpose of marriage―will inject new life into their unions. They’ll see hurting marriages find healing and watch good marriages become great. Each revitalized relationship will play a part in restoring marriage to its sacred role at the center of human civilization.

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Over a million copies sold! “An eminently practical guide to an emotionally intelligent—and long-lasting—marriage.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has revolutionized the way we understand, repair, and strengthen marriages. John Gottman’s unprecedented study of couples over a period of years has allowed him to observe the habits that can make—and break—a marriage. Here is the culmination of that work: the seven principles that guide couples on a path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward yet profound, these principles teach partners new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy. Gottman offers strategies and resources to help couples collaborate more effectively to resolve any problem, whether dealing with issues related to sex, money, religion, work, family, or anything else. Packed with new exercises and the latest research out of the esteemed Gottman Institute, this revised edition of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.

Are the wedding and honeymoon over? Have years passed since your marriage was filled with romance? Have conflicts arisen--trouble with the kids, problems with money, or struggles in your intimate relationship? Do you find yourselves divided as a couple for days, even weeks? Are the two of you focusing on who is at fault rather than what can be done? If this is your story, now is the time to resolve the conflicts in your marriage. Darrell Hines calls on you to recognize the spiritual forces that are intent on destroying your marriage. He challenges you to rediscover and reconnect with the foundational principles that keep a marriage together. He identifies key ways to prevent and confront conflict. Find a place of agreement and move on! Discover today how you can begin walking together in a new, stronger commitment! Learn how to build a relationship that faces difficulties, overcomes them, and emerges stronger than ever! This book is a must-read for all married couples...And a powerful gift for those about to make wedding vows.

"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.

Why do so many of us commit to the wrong person? Most believe that attraction and compatibility are the keys to relationship success when, in reality, these are red flags in 15-20% of the population. When it comes to love, the brain is irrational and shortsighted. We make decisions based on incomplete information, biased understanding, and strong emotion. Love truly is blind. That's why you need dating radar, it gives you a way to detect hazards you might otherwise miss by recognizing: 1. Warning signs of certain personalities that can spell love relationship danger 2. Ways that they can jam your radar (deceive you) 3. Where your own blind spots might be Attorney, mediator, and social worker Bill Eddy and relationship expert Megan Hunter use their expertise in high-conflict personalities, complicated relationships and divorce to equip readers to see through the blinding spark of new love and spot potential toxic relationships before it is too late! If hindsight is 20/20, dating radar is x-ray vision. Bill Eddy is an award-winning author and president of High Conflict Institute.Megan Hunter is a publisher, author, speaker and the founder of Unhooked Media.

Why is the potential for conflict so great for intimate partners? This volume integrates research from psychology, sociology, communications, and family studies to provide a comprehensive, practical synthesis of findings concerning conflict in close personal relationships. Combining discussion of both theory and practice, the volume illuminates why conflict occurs frequently between friends, romantic partners, distressed couples, and divorcing spouses, and also offers professionals a framework for understanding conflict as they try to help defuse strife. The book establishes conflict as a process that lies dormant in any mutually dependent relationship. Depending on the partners' strategies in conflict, the potential for disagreement can quickly become a real obstacle between them and can even threaten to end the relationship. To better determine the source of stress, three different research paradigms are presented to explain the conflict process and why it occurs, as well as to suggest what can be done to help partners manage conflict and preserve intimacy. The systems-interactionists' approach is presented first. This section discusses methods used to characterize destructive and constructive communication behavior patterns and strategies for dispute resolution. Next, the rules-interventionist approach examines ways in which a mediator can help divorcing couples end one relationship and begin another. Finally, the cognitive-exchange approach is considered. Methods used to determine the antecedent conditions which influence partners' reactions during conflict are presented and approaches for helping them modify destructive communication strategies are discussed. Throughout, terminology and measurements are made to correspond across disciplines so that the work is accessible to all. In addition to relating particular studies and research programs to their appropriate research approaches, the book shows how conflict is uniquely handled when distressed partners engage in problem solving, when disputing partners engage in mediation, and when same and opposite sex partners participate in developing relationships. Comparison and contrast emphasize the role played by conflict communication behavior, rules, and strategies found in developing intimate relationships, the destructive conflict characteristic of emotionally distressed couples, and the bargaining/negotiation characteristic of formal mediation. Drawing together the wide array of research on the topic in a user-friendly format, this book is an ideal resource for any investigator interested in distressed relationships. Offering practical methodology firmly founded in theory, it is invaluable reading for clinicians working with people in conflict. The book also serves as a text for advanced undergraduate and graduate students of conflict in interpersonal relationships, and as supplementary reading for a variety of courses where conflict is a focus of study.