This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can usually download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1898 edition. Excerpt: ...hwc, hoc? " The waiter, who had been to college, smiled, but never stirred. "What are you standing there for?" exclaimed the professor. "Didn't I order some hock?," " Yes, sir," replied the waiter. " You ordered it, but afterwards declined it. "--Exc/mnge. A little girl in a Pennsylvania town, in saying her prayers the other night, was told to pray for her father and mother, who were both very ill. and for one of the servants, who had lost her husband. She faithfully did as she was told. and then, impressed with the dreary condition of things, added on her own account: "And now, oh God, take good care of Yourself, for if anything should happen to You, we should all go to pieces. Amen."--Trained Mot/zer/zood. A fox one day passed undera tempting bunch of grapes, hanging invitingly within reach. The fox looked at them for a moment and then passed on indifferently. This was because foxes are not vegetarians, and have never been known to have any desire for grapes. Moral: /Esop was either a fool or a liar.--N. Y.journal. Teacher: "Tommy, what isa knight errant? " Tomm_y.-" Puttin' out the cat."Ind. journal. "Are you in pain, my little 1nan?" asked the kind old gentleman. " No," answered the boy, "the pain is in me. "--Indz-anapo/is journal. The following epitaph is over a grave in the Caroline Islands, which German diplomacy was trying to wrest from Spain. It would seem to show that the United States had pre-empted the soil. Sacred to Wilm. Colis Boat Steerer of the SHIP SaiNt george of New BED ford who By the Will of Almighty god was siviriliery injured by a BULL VVAALE off this Iland on 18 March 1860 also to Pedro Sabbanas of...