Dear reader: In this riveting true story, you will be amazed at the devastation, dysfunction, addiction, and finally, success in the life of the author! He has reinvented himself several times in his seventy-five years on this earth. Living his first four years in a city near Trenton, New Jersey, he moved to a small tenant house on a farm in New Egypt, New Jersey, where the dysfunction began. He lived there with his parents and siblings—always feeling poor, hungry, and abandoned! When he was ten years old, he began doing anything he wanted to do and became a juvenile delinquent.His father passed away when he was twelve, and his mother moved the family to Bordentown, New Jersey, where he felt lost and alone. To ease the pain, he began drinking and hanging out with older teenagers because it made him feel older. He was restless most of the time and began to look for adventure in the wrong ways. Drinking was not an adventure anymore, but stealing cars was! Three court appearances later, he had to reinvent himself for the first time.Now fifteen years old, it was time for another reinvention. He thought he would settle down and change his ways if he had a girlfriend. The first girlfriend didn't work, and girlfriends became another addiction over a period of three years. Alcohol and women weren't working either. The early dysfunction was still there!The chaos went on for nine more years before the redemption started; all those in recovery know what the chaos is, but the author lets you know how it works after redemption.Forty-eight years sober, with twenty-five as a licensed addiction counselor, his story will amaze you with hope and inspiration.

‘When I saw Lee cook up the paregoric, strap the tourniquet around her arm and put the needle into her vein, I was instantly captivated by a ritual that would eventually come to dominate my existence. But of course I didn’t know that then. I just wanted to try it.’ - Paul Bateman ‘I will never forget that little teaspoon. It was the only remaining item left in Paul’s flat in Durban when I went there with my wife to see what Paul had done. The only thing left. Not even a fork, or a knife or a cup to go with it. A teaspoon. Other than the clothes on his back, it was the only material thing that Paul had left in the world.’ - Mark Bateman ‘When we visited, we could hear him screaming even before we got out of the car. He was going through withdrawal, even in his comatose state, and that is when we first knew for certain that he could never have got clean if this hadn’t happened. He could never have got through that fully awake and aware and in control of himself. He wouldn’t have been able to.’ - Val Bateman This is the true story of Paul Bateman’s journey from experimentation to drug addiction and beyond. It is also an account of the experiences of the people around him, in their attempts to cope with him, before and after the overdose that almost killed him. The events are told from multiple points of view, with different chapters narrated by Paul, his girlfriend, his mother and other members of his family. The Million-Rand Teaspoon gives a complete, insightful, honest picture of the effect of drugs on the addict and his loved ones.

Addiction Treatment is an ethnography that compares two types of residential drug-free treatment programs-religious, faith-based programs and science-based, secular programs. Although these programs have originated from significantly different ideological bases, in examining the day-to-day operations of each, Daniel E. Hood concludes that they are far more alike than they are different. Drug-free treatment today, whether in secular or religious form, is little more than a remnant of the temperance movement. It is a warning to stop using drugs. At its best, treatment provides practical advice and support for complete abstinence. At its worst, it demeans users for a form of behavior that is not well understood and threatens death if they do not stop. Hood argues that there is no universal agreement on what addiction is and that drug abuse is little more than a catch-all term of no specific meaning used to condemn behavior that is socially unacceptable. Through extensive participatory observations, intimate life history interviews, and informal conversations with residents and staff, Hood shows how both programs use the same basic techniques of ideological persuasion (mutual witnessing), methods of social control (discourse deprivation), and the same proposed zero tolerance, abstinent lifestyle (Christian living vs. Right living) as they endeavor to transform clients from addicts to citizens or from sinners to disciples.

If you live for people's acceptance, you'll die from their rejection. Two-time Grammy winning rap artist, Lecrae, learned this lesson through more than his share of adversity—childhood abuse, drugs and alcoholism, a stint in rehab, an abortion, and an unsuccessful suicide attempt. Along the way, Lecrae attained an unwavering faith in Jesus and began looking to God for affirmation. Now as a chart-topping industry anomaly, he has learned to ignore the haters and make peace with his craft. The rap artist holds nothing back as he divulges the most sensitive details of his life, answers his critics, shares intimate handwritten journal entries, and powerfully models how to be a Christian in a secular age. This is the story of one man's journey to faith and freedom. *Cover/Interior design by Alex Medina, photography by Mary Caroline Mann

A compassionate, shame-free guide for your darkest days “A one-of-a-kind book . . . to read for yourself or give to a struggling friend or loved one without the fear that depression and suicidal thoughts will be minimized, medicalized or over-spiritualized.”—Kay Warren, cofounder of Saddleback Church What happens when loving Jesus doesn’t cure you of depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts? You might be crushed by shame over your mental illness, only to be told by well-meaning Christians to “choose joy” and “pray more.” So you beg God to take away the pain, but nothing eases the ache inside. As darkness lingers and color drains from your world, you’re left wondering if God has abandoned you. You just want a way out. But there’s hope. In I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die, Sarah J. Robinson offers a healthy, practical, and shame-free guide for Christians struggling with mental illness. With unflinching honesty, Sarah shares her story of battling depression and fighting to stay alive despite toxic theology that made her afraid to seek help outside the church. Pairing her own story with scriptural insights, mental health research, and simple practices, Sarah helps you reconnect with the God who is present in our deepest anguish and discover that you are worth everything it takes to get better. Beautifully written and full of hard-won wisdom, I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die offers a path toward a rich, hope-filled life in Christ, even when healing doesn’t look like what you expect.

"This is the addict's journey: how it happens, how it progresses, and how it ends. Fortunately, this is also the journey of recovery: how it happens, and how it blossoms. There is always hope." --"Dr. Drew" Pinsky, M.D.Heroin addiction didn't make Tim a better person. It stole more than half of his life. But he's dedicated every waking minute since walking out of prison to dealing hope to addicts and their families. By his own account, Tim Ryan shouldn't be here. But as he states, "Where there is life, there is hope." Known as The Hope Dealer, Tim is a successful entrepreneur, grateful recovering heroin addict and alcoholic, nationally ranked barefoot water skier--and truth-talking, convicted felon.*As a business leader in a high-tech industry, Tim made and lost millions. *As a father and husband, Tim introduced his own son to deadly drugs. *As a heroin addict, Tim is a walking miracle. He's overdosed eight times, was pronounced clinically dead three, and suffered two minor heart attacks. He's been arrested more than ten times and served prison time alongside known gang leaders--many of whom became his closest confidants in recovery.*As the founder of A Man in Recovery Foundation and motivational speaker, Tim's mission is to help one addict at a time transform their lives from dope to hope.Tim has been a featured thought leader in numerous national media, including USA Today, Newsweek, and "The Steve Harvey Show with Dr. Drew," and dozens of nationally syndicated radio shows. He was an invited guest by the U.S. President to the 2016 State of the Union Address. This story chronicles Tim's grueling journey into addiction, loss, and recovery. Sit with Tim in his prison cell. Walk with him as loved ones are torn from his reach. Rejoice with him as lives are miraculously recovered.

There are awesome and powerful creative forces that can be fully tapped; that will absolutely unleash our dreams and hopes transforming them into a desired reality; or these very same forces will send us into the deepest darkest Hell we have ever known! If a person fails to understand that they have a huge responsibility to take full possession and control of this great creative power, then that failure to take this responsibility will always lead to these forces taking control of the person in an undesirable, destructive and potentially deadly manner. In other words opportunities and temptations to use drugs or alcohol will present themselves as a direct result of failing to take control of these forces or misusing their power! All addictions are a manifestation caused by the poor or improper use of these forces and powers! The very Powers that govern the ability for anyone to accomplish anything in their lives for their good; are the very same powers that can and will undermine and destroy those efforts! This book will give you the essential Eleven Powers and Eleven Arts that will enable you to change your life. The use of these Powers and Arts will enable you to take full control of not only your addiction, but provide endless opportunities to create and design an entire new Destiny! Addicts and alcoholics have inadvertently mastered the principles of success and use those very same concepts to assure their own failure and destruction! By forcing yourself to do what you dont want to do enables you to gain hold of and grasp these powerful forces and turn them in the direction of success instead of failure! Teach yourself and learn to direct the awesome creative forces within you and learn to turn your Possibilities into Probabilities!

In 1993, Donna Palomba was raped by a masked assailant in her own home. Yet, her story is more than a victim’s tale of physical and emotional recovery. It is a story of one woman’s hunt for justice while fending off attacks by institutions designed to defend and protect her—the police department, the local government, and a community clinging to an outrageous claim that Donna had invented the crime to cover up a sexual affair. From the night of the attack, the botched crime scene investigation, and the abuse as authorities attempted to close the case by discrediting her, Donna was left as a victim with no name and no identity. Meanwhile, there was one courageous detective, later to become chief of police, who broke a cops’ code of silence in the name of justice. As they fought on, a legal battle ensued after the Waterbury Police Department—now with media support—refused to let go of its allegations against her and admit wrongdoing. Finally, after eleven years of struggle, Donna learned the identity of her attacker from the chief of police, who explained that the DNA from the rape kit taken a decade ago had turned up a shocking match. In 2007, Donna Palomba was the subject of a special two-hour Dateline episode about her case. Suddenly, she was Jane Doe no more, launching the Jane Doe No More organization and becoming a promoter of the rights of women and victims of sexual assault. With the help of crime investigator and author M. William Phelps, this is her story.

In the Christian Church and the world at large today, addiction to pornography is not just a crisis, it is the crisis. The approach for many has been to label this a war, and scores of books and teachers have tried to show that using various control methods and tools in order to deal with the problem leads to freedom. But the crisis continues to grow, and true freedom, the kind that Jesus seems to be pointing to in the Gospels, seems forever out of reach. This powerless approach has left millions with out true freedom and asking some very hard questions about themselves, their sexuality, and the nature of God. In this groundbreaking new book on an age-old topic, author Seth Taylor leads us into the question: "Is there any real power? And if there is, why don't we see it more?" With this question as the starting point, Taylor shows readers how to peel back the layers of all the things people are medicating with pornography and other "drugs". He gives readers the tools to make their Spirits come alive. Through a compelling combination of stories and spiritually grounded teaching from his own pilgrimage, Taylor shows readers that freedom is not a myth, but rather the essence of every human being, created in the image of God.Feels Like Redemption powerfully teaches that this journey into sexual and spiritual health is not a battle. It's a Pilgrimage - a Sacred Journey. And in walking this journey, we can be changed forever.

New York magazine was born in 1968 after a run as an insert of the New York Herald Tribune and quickly made a place for itself as the trusted resource for readers across the country. With award-winning writing and photography covering everything from politics and food to theater and fashion, the magazine's consistent mission has been to reflect back to its audience the energy and excitement of the city itself, while celebrating New York as both a place and an idea.