Are your kids growing up in a war zone? Here's Your Peace Treaty When co-parents conflict, their kids get caught in the middle. They become 'adultified,' infantilized, and alienated. They're made into messengers and spies, implicitly forced to grow up too fast or to remain needy for much too long. The antidote: practicing child-centered parenting--consistently creating parenting plans and conflict resolution strategies that genuinely meet children's emotional and psychological needs--first and foremost and for the rest of their lives. Keeping Kids out of the Middle is not about divorce, and it's not about you. It is about your kids. This eye-opening and highly pragmatic book is a here-and-now guide toward better understanding and meeting the needs of your children. You will learn what child-centered parenting is, how to implement it productively, and how to communicate effectively with your parenting partners, no matter the legal status of your relationship, the distance between your homes, or the quality of your intimate relationship. In Keeping Kids out of the Middle, child psychologist and state certified Guardian ad litem Benjamin Garber offers parents a radically new perspective on co-parenting in the midst of relationship conflict and teaches co-parents how to build a consistent, healthy environment for their children through the art of 'scripting,' establish better means of communicating and communication styles, and create parenting plans that help keep children protected. Thisis your guide to putting your children's needs first and giving them the safety net they must have in order to become healthy adults who are able themselves, to some day, keep their own kids out of the middle.

Decades of psychological research has taught us that divorce need not harm children. The damage is done when kids are triangulated into adult conflict, with or without the formalities of marriage or divorce. Enlisted as infantrymen in an adult war, these kids are at tremendous risk for serious social, emotional, educational and health concerns. Dr. Benjamin Garber –child psychologist, Guardian ad litem, Parenting Coordinator, national speaker and award winning author- paints the picture of the children triangulated into their caregivers' conflict with bold strokes. This is the first book to present this epidemic of childhood as it exists beyond the legalities of divorce. In doing so, Dr. Garber gives us here-and-now useful strategies with which to improve our co-parenting and to keep our kids out of the middle. Dr. Garber brings his background in child and family development, his expertise as a court-appointed evaluator and his deep compassion for children's wellbeing to the task of helping us to better meet our kids' needs. Keeping Kids Out Of The Middle! gives parents and child-centered professionals alike the tools with which to: Improve child-centered communication even among highly conflicted co-parents Make child-centered decisions about the future of the adult relationship 'Script' adult conflict and family transition so that the kids hear one, consistent message Answer children's painful and provocative questions Create child-centered post-separation and post-divorce parenting plans Recognize and minimize the kids' risk of being adultified, parentified, infantilized and alienated Anticipate and respond to 'visitation' resistance and refusal Keeping Kids Out of the Middle! is both a title and a mandate. Its about the health of the next generation. Keeping Kids Out of the Middle! is required reading in the ancient art of cooperative caregiving.

PARENTING NEVER ENDS. From the founders of the #1 site for parents of teens and young adults comes an essential guide for building strong relationships with your teens and preparing them to successfully launch into adulthood The high school and college years: an extended roller coaster of academics, friends, first loves, first break-ups, driver’s ed, jobs, and everything in between. Kids are constantly changing and how we parent them must change, too. But how do we stay close as a family as our lives move apart? Enter the co-founders of Grown and Flown, Lisa Heffernan and Mary Dell Harrington. In the midst of guiding their own kids through this transition, they launched what has become the largest website and online community for parents of fifteen to twenty-five year olds. Now they’ve compiled new takeaways and fresh insights from all that they’ve learned into this handy, must-have guide. Grown and Flown is a one-stop resource for parenting teenagers, leading up to—and through—high school and those first years of independence. It covers everything from the monumental (how to let your kids go) to the mundane (how to shop for a dorm room). Organized by topic—such as academics, anxiety and mental health, college life—it features a combination of stories, advice from professionals, and practical sidebars. Consider this your parenting lifeline: an easy-to-use manual that offers support and perspective. Grown and Flown is required reading for anyone looking to raise an adult with whom you have an enduring, profound connection.

When a marriage ends, the most important thing divorcing parents can do is to help their children through this difficult transition and remain united as parents even if they are no longer united as a couple. In Parenting Apart divorce coach Christina McGhee offers practical advice on how to help children adjust and thrive during and after separation and divorce. She looks at all the different issues parents may face with their children of different ages, offering immediate solutions to the most critical parenting problems divorce brings, including: ·When to tell your children about the divorce and what to say ·How to create a loving, secure home if your child doesn't live with you full time ·What to do if your child is angry or sad ·How to manage the legal system, including information on family law and issues of custody ·How to deal with a difficult ex This is an invaluable resource that offers parents quick access to the information you most need at a time when you need it most.

Solve toddler challenges with eight key mindshifts that will help you parent with clarity, calmness, and self-control. In Why is My Child in Charge?, Claire Lerner shows how making critical mindshifts—seeing children’s behaviors through a new lens —empowers parents to solve their most vexing childrearing challenges. Using real life stories, Lerner unpacks the individualized process she guides parents through to settle common challenges, such as throwing tantrums in public, delaying bedtime for hours, refusing to participate in family mealtimes, and resisting potty training. Lerner then provides readers with a roadmap for how to recognize the root cause of their child’s behavior and how to create and implement an action plan tailored to the unique needs of each child and family. Why is My Child in Charge? is like having a child development specialist in your home. It shows how parents can develop proven, practical strategies that translate into adaptable, happy kids and calm, connected, in-control parents.

From leading researchers, this book presents important advances in understanding how growing up in a discordant family affects child adjustment, the factors that make certain children more vulnerable than others, and what can be done to help. It is a state-of-the-science follow-up to the authors' seminal earlier work, Children and Marital Conflict: The Impact of Family Dispute and Resolution. The volume presents a new conceptual framework that draws on current knowledge about family processes; parenting; attachment; and children's emotional, physiological, cognitive, and behavioral development. Innovative research methods are explained and promising directions for clinical practice with children and families are discussed.

A modern parenting classic—a guide to a new and gentle way of understanding the care and nurture of infants, by the internationally renowned childcare expert, podcaster, and author of No Bad Kids “An absolute go-to for all parents, therapists, anyone who works with, is, or knows parents of young children.”—Wendy Denham, PhD A Resources for Infant Educarers (RIE) teacher and student of pioneering child specialist Magda Gerber, Janet Lansbury helps parents look at the world through the eyes of their infants and relate to them as whole people who have natural abilities to learn without being taught. Once we are able to view our children in this light, even the most common daily parenting experiences become stimulating opportunities to learn, discover, and connect with our child. A collection of the most-read articles from Janet’s popular and long-running blog, Elevating Child Care focuses on common infant issues, including: • Nourishing our babies’ healthy eating habits • Calming your clingy, fearful child • How to build your child’s focus and attention span • Developing routines that promote restful sleep Eschewing the quick-fix tips and tricks of popular parenting culture, Lansbury’s gentle, insightful guidance lays the foundation for a closer, more fulfilling parent-child relationship, and children who grow up to be authentic, confident, successful adults.

Announcing that rare parenting book that will not only help you become a more effective parent but actually change how you see your children. Written by Montessori educator Simone Davies, this book shows you how to bring the educational values of a Montessori classroom into your home—while turning the whole idea of the “terrible twos” on its head. Here is how to set up Montessori-friendly spaces in your home. Principles for fostering curiosity in your child—and in yourself. Specific Montessori skills—the winter coat flip; getting your toddler to pour his or her own water and clean up whatever spills might occur. And it goes much deeper, showing how a parent can really be present, be the child’s guide, and handle tantrums and problematic behavior without resorting to bribes, threats, or punishment and truly celebrate every stage. It’s also that rare parenting book that’s beautiful to look at, with a bright, airy design and simple color illustrations and photographs.

A psychologist with a reputation for penetrating to the heart of complex parenting issues joins forces with a physician and bestselling author to tackle one of the most disturbing and misunderstood trends of our time -- peers replacing parents in the lives of our children. Dr. Neufeld has dubbed this phenomenon peer orientation, which refers to the tendency of children and youth to look to their peers for direction: for a sense of right and wrong, for values, identity and codes of behaviour. But peer orientation undermines family cohesion, poisons the school atmosphere, and fosters an aggressively hostile and sexualized youth culture. It provides a powerful explanation for schoolyard bullying and youth violence; its effects are painfully evident in the context of teenage gangs and criminal activity, in tragedies such as in Littleton, Colorado; Tabor, Alberta and Victoria, B.C. It is an escalating trend that has never been adequately described or contested until Hold On to Your Kids. Once understood, it becomes self-evident -- as do the solutions. Hold On to Your Kids will restore parenting to its natural intuitive basis and the parent-child relationship to its rightful preeminence. The concepts, principles and practical advice contained in Hold On to Your Kids will empower parents to satisfy their children’s inborn need to find direction by turning towards a source of authority, contact and warmth. Something has changed. One can sense it, one can feel it, just not find the words for it. Children are not quite the same as we remember being. They seem less likely to take their cues from adults, less inclined to please those in charge, less afraid of getting into trouble. Parenting, too, seems to have changed. Our parents seemed more confident, more certain of themselves and had more impact on us, for better or for worse. For many, parenting does not feel natural. Adults through the ages have complained about children being less respectful of their elders and more difficult to manage than preceding generations, but could it be that this time it is for real? -- from Hold On to Your Kids

Our children are the next great dreamers, educators, explorers, and leaders.It is now, in their childhood, that we give them the tools that shape them, the heart that drives them, and the knowledge that guides them. Our kids face an uncertain future filled with incredible pressures and challenges. They will need to change it, to change their world.And they can do it too! With your guidance and the experiences in this book, our children will not onlysurvivein this world, they will THRIVE! Our kids have qualities that need to be developed and balanced in order to be successful. Each of these qualities can be likened to accounts that arenecessary to live a healthy, balanced, and strong life. That's why we've given you a great way to teach these concepts-physical health, emotional strength, social skills, spiritual balance, and intellectual growth-to your children. We've included activities, discussions, and questions that will empower you to raise a more resilient, stronger child. Enjoy these lessons at your own pace: whether you spend five minutes or an hour, you will connect with your child on a new level. Deeper connectionsfacilitate both learning and bonding, and together you will help your child find their greatness and build a happy, strong life."