Feeling put down? Feeling insulted? Snap back! In this collection, readers find hundreds of funny ways to do just that, with some of the best and worst jokes around, silly gags, nutty one-liners, and more!

This text brims over with stinging comments, verbal face slappings and subtle insults for dealing with every kind of person.

Garfield, the feline master of the ironic aside, puts his paw to the grindstone and lets loose with these gems: good-natured insults, purr-fect put-downs, and deceptively sweet slams. For the young, the old, and the cranky at heart, Garfield knows how you feel sometimes—and he says it, in so many words.

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”—Groucho Marx An insult can be offensive and infuriating, but it means nothing if you have a better comeback. 1001 Insults, Put-Downs, and Comebacks gathers together the very sharpest of these barbs from a wide variety of sources, with some of the wickedest put-downs from the literary, political, and entertainment worlds, along with many others.

If you can't say something nice... say it in emoji. Shock your friends and family with this brilliantly offensive collection of emoji put-downs and comebacks. With this handy guide, the endless potential for a punishing emoji burn will be opened to you like never before – far beyond just relying on the classic middle finger symbol. From everyday insults to brutal Shakespearean zingers, classic movie put-downs to the best ‘your mum’ jokes, this is your complete phrasebook for the ever more savage world of emoji insults.

'He's 100% political herpes. Back in six months whatever you do. Or three days, like last time.' Camilla Long on Nigel Farage 'You're as ugly as a salad.' Bulgarian insult 'I'm going to beat him so bad he'll need a shoehorn to put his hat on.' Muhammed Ali There's no pleasure like a perfectly turned put-down (when it's directed at somebody else, of course) but Matthew Parris's Scorn is sharply different from the standard collections. Here are the funniest, sharpest, rudest and most devastating insults in history, from ancient Roman graffiti to the battlefields of Twitter. Drawing on bile from such masters as Dorothy Parker, Elizabeth I, Donald Trump, Groucho Marx, Princess Anne, Winston Churchill, Nigel Farage, Mae West and Alastair Campbell - which form an exchange between voices down the ages - Scorn shows that abuse can be an art form. This collection includes extended literary invective as well as short verbal shin-kicks. Encompassing literature, art, politics, showbiz, marriage, gender, nationality and religion, Matthew Parris's sublime collection is the perfect companion for the festive season, whether you're searching for the perfect elegant riposte, the rudest polite letter ever written, or a brutal verbal sledgehammer.

A brilliant collection of insults and sharp retorts for every situation. Includes studied insults, wry putdowns, literary, political, and dramatic rebukes, playground insults, barbs and jibes. The perfect resource for responding to life's slings and arrows with humour and satisfying venom.

Away, you scullion, you rampallion, you fustilarian! Along with penning some of the most sublime passages in all of English Literature, Shakespeare was a master when it came to casting a wicked comeback or hurling a barbed insult. Whether it's Prospero calling Caliban a 'freckled whelp, hag-born' in The Tempest or King Lear railing against his daughter Goneril with the damning words, 'Thou art a boil, a plague sore, an embossed carbuncle in my corrupted blood', Shakespeare didn't hold back when it came to getting creative with his slights. Packed full of eloquent stings and poisonous putdowns, this is the perfect resource for anyone looking to scorn an enemy – without resorting to swearing! 'Away, you starvelling, you elf-skin, you dried neat's-tongue, bull's-pizzle, you stock-fish!' Henry IV Part I (Act 2, Scene 4). 'Away, you three-inch fool.' The Taming of the Shrew (Act 4, Scene 1). 'Go, prick thy face, and over-red thy fear, Thou lily-liver'd boy.' Macbeth (Act 5, Scene 3). 'The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes.' The Comedy of Errors (Act 5, Scene 4).

Here is the classic collection of quotes from Francis Ford Coppola's The Godfather. Francis Ford Coppola's The Godfather is one of the greatest movies of all time and one of the most popular: on its 35th anniversary, it continues to be a top earner on video and DVD. But what has made this classic so compelling is the unique Corleone wit and wisdom. Every fan will want to own this officially licensed, completely fascinating anthology of memorable words from the film. It features a great selection of famous quotes from the Family, from the Don's unforgettable I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse to Clemenza's infamous, Leave the gun. Take the cannolis. Every sharp and witty line will bring back a memory of this great movie--and that makes it a perfect gift for every Godfather aficionado. Who would dare to resist?